The Bar

Tonight I was at Mulligan’s Open Mic in Eugene Oregon.

Most of you probably already know that I don’t really play what you would call “happy” music.

My music is mostly slow and people often use the term “melancholy” or “sad” to describe it.

I don’t really see it as such but it’s not really about me, it’s about you.

As a performer you have a responsibility to your audience.

You have to have a relationship with them or they will not respond to what you’re doing.

I often struggle with this because for me music is an experiment, and when I write a song, often times, I’m writing it to process something that I’m going through.

My music being slow comes from not being able to switch chords on the guitar fast enough.

I’ve only been playing the guitar for a relatively short amount of time and when I wrote a lot of my songs I wrote them at a very slow tempo to accommodate for my lack of ability.

I was home schooled and I don’t really do very well with authority.

When I feel like I have to do something I am much less inclined to do it.

This is a challenge for me because I don’t always want to play slow sad songs but at the same time I get frustrated with people telling me what to do.

My friends and family have told me on more then a few occasions that I should play “happier” music.

This makes me want to do it even less.

I care about my audience, I really do, but I don’t want to have to compromise what I do as an artist just to make other people happy.

That would make me very unhappy.

This is something that I struggle with as a musician and an artist.

How can I do things that resonate with other people but not have to compromise what I need to do for my self?

Lately it has gotten to a point where I don’t really even feel motivated to go out to an open mic or try and book a show because I don’t want to always be “the guy who plays the sad music”.

I don’t always want to bring that kind of energy into the world.

Tonight I played: “Heart & Soul” by me, “Song To The Siren” by Tim Buckley, “Paparazzi” by Lady Gaga and “Same Road” by me.

I played them well and I enjoyed my self while I was playing.

I put my heart & soul into every song I played.

I guess at a certain point you just stop caring what other people think.

And I guess that most everyone who’s ever created anything and tried to share it with the world has felt this way at some point or another.

Lately I’ve been thinking about trying out stand up comedy.

I already have some material about being a singer song writer who only plays sad music.

Thanks for listening.